I SEEM TO DO NOTHING BUT CHARITY WORK

I beleive everyone thinks about suicide at one time or another, and that for most, this is the only time in their pathetic lives that they will flirt with having a sane, rational thought. So, once more, it is off to do some charity work for the good of all mankind, or at least to lower my own personal annoyance level... I am going out into the streets armed to the teeth to take down people who are suicidal -- most of whom do not yet realize that they are suicidal (I suspect there will also be dozens of causalties amongst those who really should be suicidal and are not only because of their own lack of taste). Charity work, thou name is Pain. First it was going down to the library and punching out Grishom readers and then it was the scientology brain wash center for general garroting and fingernail and butt related torture, and now killing off all these suicidal cowards. I am so much greater of a humanitarian than like ghandi, martin, sister teresa and snoop dog all rolled into one... not to mention jesus's big brother Nebils (he would have been the christ, but he preferred to be a 'mary'; all the Catholics secretly know this, and preists all call themselves Mary' when no one else is around (with the exceptions only of warthogs, who we we all know could hardly claim the moral high ground, since they do indeed eat their young, and not in the way the preiets do).

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PEE WEE HERMAN WS FRAMED...

The cops got to his penis. Turned it on him. You slap someone around like Pee Wee did his penis, you got to expect the damn thing to turn on you. Yea, that penis was telling the cops where Pee Wee was, and what and who he was doing, in what orifice and with what thrust frequency 24 hours a day. This is not just an idle conspiracy theory dreamt up by some stoned writer in Chicago... . It's more than that. I mean, who wanted to bring PEE WEE down?

He was a gay hollywood player and you know that scared some people. This was right at the height of Act Up's breif rise to political power. Yea, the government, they knew his penis was his weakness. He just couldn't leave it alone. So, they bugged his balls, got the penis to point him right into an adult movie theater, and practically jump out of his pants.... oh, yea... Yea, the Pee was wee that day, so to speak.

I have now set the record straight. Please, spread the word, the government will do anything to keep down Pee Wee and his irrepressible Wee Pee (as PW calls his little one).

No free man of good conscious should rest easy until this penis related tragedy is dealt with.



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love they neighbor as thyself????

Does this mean that I am biblically commanded to rub the quims of hotties who live next door to me? I mean, does this mean that god himself has decreed that I am to LOVE MY NEIGHBORS AS I LOVE MYSELF??? And if so, is it just like a couple blocks, or is it the whole city?

I mean, I think I may be required to give hand jobs to thousands of chicks... and by god if that is what it takes to save my soul then.... LOVE THEY NEIGHBOR AS YOU LOVE THYSELF... since I am something of a chronic masterbater, this is going to involve a hell of a lot of dildo's and lubricants and German Sheperds trained in oral pleasuring by the ancient, chinese method that this guy Floyd who lives in a trailer at the dog track came up with. Floyd always has wine and will share it with anybody who can take his constant talk about all 'the bitches' he was 'boning' (he makes it out like he means women, but we all know he is talking about the dogs, who he buys little dresses and wigs and even make up).

Okay, I think I just had a vision from God... Yes, I did... I am commanded to love my neighbors as I do myself, and this indeed does mean that I am going to be neck deep in sweet, young things who taste like Cherry Sweet Tarts. If I am going to do this, then I have to pleasure them as many times as I have myself, so I really have a hell of a lot of catching up to do.... This could take a lot of vacuum cleaners too, not too powerful though... I won't lose any clit.'s on my watch... oh, hell no... not on my watch.

I always wondered what christians did without smokes and drinks and weed and killing whores and setting fires and fun shit? Now I know -- they are loving each other.... This explains those silly empty smiles too. And of course, now I see why now why they defend their religion despite all evidence to the contrary -- they will do anything to keep the babes believing in this whole 'love they neighbor as theyself thing...' I sure as hell wish someone had told me this years ago.


This is exactly what I needed to know to renew my faith in jesus and the super freinds. Hail Mary's Hymen and heil Jesus and fly, Super man, fly like the Easter Weasel...


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