Getting People Out To Vote... at Gunpoint.

I think all the gangs should get some good press, and a good lesson  in real power, by being paid to go door to door getting people to vote.  Of course, they should be heavily armed.  Like I do around here.  Believe me, you shoot up a couple houses on your block, and when you go by with a megaphone later telling them to line up to vote...   They come right out.  I mean, they know I have explosives hidden somewhere on their property that will go off if they piss me off and all.  Of course, at this point, I usually groin kick the republicans, break their legs, whatever... believe me, that ambulance ain't heading toward the voting booth...   It is surprising how many republicans have become democrats on my block because of this policy.  I then march them -- and yes, on this block, they damn well better be able to march, or at least get a wheelie out of their little traveling chairs...  then I take them one by one into the voting booth and 'show them' how to vote the right way.  There is nothing like being a serial killer for the CIA for getting to live like a rugged individualists.  Like Cheney said during one his late night chat's with Satan, "Plausible denial. Works like a goddamn spell on these sheep."   

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BREAKFAST WITH THE OBAMA'S

After reading an article about town hall protesters, the president holds up the paper to Michelle, asking, "Honey, how does it feel to be a woman from the south side of Chicago who is married to Hitler?  A commie, muslim, Indonesian, anti-christ, Hitler, none-the-less."

"Not in front of the girls, Barrack."

"Daddy, are you Hitler?"

"No, dear, Daddy does not like Hitler.  He was a very, very bad man.  Daddy is your daddy.  These people like to pretend that is what I am like."

"Why?"

"Remember when we talked about bullies?"

"Yes."

"Well, they are bullies."

"Tell the teacher, daddy."

"You know what, I think I will."

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this work is protected by a commercial common use license. Feel free to spread my words...john scott ridgway